All The Rage

Waaa waaa wee waaa! Dubya McNearbeer The Albanian Idol finally found a place other than Texassistan where the crowds don't need to be hand-picked and nobody makes fun of his broken English! Since 79% of the citizens of the country he is supposed to be 'leading', feel the United States is headed in the wrong direction; maybe we could get John Conyers to work out a deal with their President Alfred Moisiu (or as Dubya likes to call him...Alfie The Albanian). Instead of impeaching Bush, we can just deport him to Albania, the one country that likes him. To sweeten the deal we'll throw in a life-time supply of Swatches and O'Douls. Oh yeah, and while you're at it John, see if Transylvania will take Cheney.

This week, while 'Merkans were rapt with schadenfreude at the plight of a poor little rich girl that got thrown in the pokey; a trend formed by corpulent pasty wealthy geezers bent on WWIII has been trying desperately to take off. For weeks they've been trying to blame violence in Iraq on Iran even without any credible evidence. But much to their chagrin, I guess 'Merkans aren't so ready to believe their latest fish tale about weapons. The Neocons even trotted out their favorite Non-Partisan Ass Coverer, Joe Lieberman and had him hit the Sunday talk shows to promote the Bomb Iran idea. Tough luck for them, it turns out that idea is as popular as New Coke and Americans have no interest in further regime change save their own.

Here's a little fact that the overpaid dumb as a bag of door-knobs Democratic strategists haven't a clue about; the United States is not trending towards conservatism and the Democrats do not need to move to the right to get elected. Conservatives actually really really suck at swaying public opinion for extended periods of time and Karl Rove is not the boy genius they think he is. He fashions lies and then tells his charge to just keep repeating his lies. Whoop de fucking doo! Being an asshole does not necessarily make one a genius people.

Sorry but the simple tactic of repeating sing-songy hollow disengenuous phrases ad infinitum does not a real lasting political movement make. Eventually they grow stale and become fodder for the late night comedians to mock. Yeah, yeah I know...the infamous propagandist Goebbels said if you repeat a lie enough it becomes the truth....but as Steven Colbert has illustrated it really only becomes the truthiness. And by the way...Goebbels ended shooting himself in the head.

Let's see...what contemporary Conservative ideals have a shot at becoming an enduring societal trend? Abstinence Only Education? From what I hear, it literally sucks. Creationism? America, please give me a show of hands from those that want medical students who diagnose, operate and prescribe drugs to study the Bible instead of biology text books. Conservative Family Values? Okaaaay...the highest polling GOP candidate has three divorces under his belt and a 25 year old trophy wife. The second highest polling GOP candidate is another serial divorcer that also seems to enjoy cross dressing but since his first marriage was to a second cousin that might help him connect with voters in the reddest of states. Oh yeah, he announced his second divorce during a press conference without telling his wife first and his children don't speak to him. Ohio's own Steve LaTourette used a fax machine to tell his wife he was divorcing her to hook up with one of his young female aides. Two names: Ted Haggard and Mark Foley. And finally...oh the hell with it...just read this.

So I'm just guessing here, but as an amateur trend-watcher I'd say that the 2006 elections that yanked the Congress from GOP was just the beginning of a long trend in America back towards the left of center political position or as I like to call it...sanity. I mean even, it's inventor, believes that Neoconservatism is sooooo yesterday.

And while the Cons have dominated the AM radio dial for decades, the left was messing around with Al Gore's silly internets. Gee, I wonder which of those two will be the bigger influence on our society twenty years from now?