Thursday, March 22, 2007

United States, Inc.

Reason #45,983 why Republicans should not be allowed within breathing distance of education policy: today former Fox News spokeshole Tony 'I Don't Know' Snow stood at the podium in the briefing room and told reporters 'Congress does not have over-sight responsibility over the White House'. Does he mean that Congress cannot approve the caterers for state dinners? They can't order pruning of The Rose Garden? Maybe he thinks that Congress might sanction Barney for taking a crap in the Lincoln Bedroom. Alas, while Snow is a tad on the simple side he's not that simple.

Snow's statement had no other meaning than he believes Congress has no responsibility to act as a check on the Executive and that Congress is not an equal branch. Snowjob should audition as a contestant on that new show on his old network "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?"...he might learn something about government which might be of use.

Implying that Snow is just ignorant regarding the framework of our system of government is likely inaccurate. The 'Bushies' do not view government as The Founders had or most Americans do. This administration is led by and rife with private-sector cronies that view government as a corporation. They look at Congress as middle-management tasked with implementing upper management (administration) policy. They do not understand that the Executive Branch is there to 'execute' the laws passed by Congress, not the other way around. When Congress fails to 'play ball' they get 'a warning' from BushCo, like here, here, here, here and here.

As is often common in corporate culture, becoming a valuable team player in BushCo does not necessarily require education, talent or experience applicable to the department where one is placed- it just takes loyalty and unquestioning obedience. Another trait BushCo and corporate culture have in common is that when one of the big bosses screws up, they fire the loyal underling that did as he/she was told. George Lakoff explains this is how conservatives 'hold themselves accountable'.....when caught in a scandal, they fire those who followed the bad policy rather than those who developed and implemented it.

For six years prior to November 2006, The Warner-In-Chief didn't have to worry too much about Congress disobeying his orders. But, as Mama Boxer told that James Inhofe (R-Tantrumtown), elections have consequences. So after six long years citizens are getting a refresher course on how our government was meant to operate.

No executive be they public or private sector has the 'privilege' to use their office in an unethical or illegal manner. The 8 federal prosecutors involved in Gonzo-gate were not fired for national security concerns. They were not fired for poor job performance. They were fired because they brought cases against corrupt Republican officials and refused to prosecute phantom 'voter fraud' cases.

There are some out there who are upset that Gonzo-gate distracts from the issue of Iraq but they shouldn't be. We cannot tolerate an Executive branch that puts itself above the laws of our land and views our of/by/for the people government as their own personal Enron. We are the shareholders of the United States of America and Congress is our Board of Directors. This is the first step in reclaiming our ownership of this country and finally holding the Executives themselves accountable.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Why, You Must Be Mistaken!

This week we learned that our congressionally approved state federal prosecutors 'serve at the pleasure of the president'. Is it just me kids or do you all get a wicked case of the heebie jeebies when you hear that phrase now? It has an icky pervy S&M Master/Slave vibe. Eeeewww! Not only that, I was under the impression that serving at the pleasure of another in any state except Nevada was a felony.

I don't know if Gonzo The Factually Challenged Torture Boy knows this or not (he could), but most of us could actually give a flying crap whether Dubya McPleasurePants receives said emotional gratification or not. His position as the highest elected official of the United States does not exempt him from the law or ethical traditions of his office. In fact, Mr. Bush serves 'at the pleasure' of the citizenry of this nation (eeeewwww!) and it has become way past high time we illustrate this truth to him as he clearly believes otherwise.

The president's pleasure , according to his administration and the other assorted Republix butt-smoochers, is supposed to be of utmost importance to the entire planet dontcha know? The rest of the world has forgotten to show their gratitude for the Iraq invasion and our support of corporations that rape and pillage their natural resources; and this displeases him. Don't they realize that he is The Commander In Chief Of Everything And Then Some?! Sheesh, it's almost like they really don't.

Now folks, don't expect perfection from our pleasure-seeking President or his pleasure-giving followers. I mean, as far as we know, they are human and have illustrated a willingness to admit mistakes. Granted the ownership of said mistakes still remains a mystery, but something tells me this administration would find admitting who made them very unpleasant.

Over the last six years we've heard a lot about The Mistakes that were made: Walter-Gate, Torture-Gate, Katrina-Gate, Abramoff-Gate, Warrantless Spying-Gate, Foley-Gate, Plame-Gate, WMD-Gate, Iraq-Gate, just to name a few..and now we've got Gonzo-Gate! Daahaayammm! That's a whole mother-effing boat-load of mistakes! And they still have their jobs! Hmmmm.

You know kids? I think that I will adopt this ass-covering responsibility-avoidant language for myself! It certainly seems to have worked like a charm for the Bush Administration. Just think of all those pesky consequences of the 'mistakes' I make that I'll be able to get myself out of!

The next time I am pulled over for speeding, I will say "Officer, I admit mistakes were made. First, Volkswagen put an accelerator pedal in this vehicle and it was placed there to use it at my pleasure. Second, speed limits have become quaint. Finally, it is a well-established fact that 'speed limit failure' blame is shared among the local, state and federal governments." Of course, the reasonable officer will succumb to my logic and let me go without even bothering with a silly warning.

Wow, maybe I really should thank Bush! Not paying any price for my wrongdoing opens a whole new world to me! All I have to do is say that a mistake was made and I can do anything I want. I don't have to say who made it. I don't have to say why 'it' was made. I don't have to even give one little smidgen of a detail as to how the mistake came into existence. How exciting! I can't wait any longer....I'm goin for a ride!

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Pardonnez Moi?

Good news kids! Our justice system isn't completely broken yet! Scooter Libby, bestial pedophile porn auteur extraordinaire, was convicted on four counts of perjury & obstruction of justice. Fitzy did a bang up job prosecuting this case and will inevitably be rewarded in the standard Bush Administration manner by receiving his pink slip. Had Fitzy thrown the whole thing he would have been eligible for a bright shiny Medal of Freedom; good thing he's one of those guys who isn't into jewelry.

Just over two hours after the verdict was announced, the neocon rag, The National Review posted an op-ed signed by all it's editors called "Pardon Libby Now" on their website. The Wall Street Journal, still too snobby for the internets, published their 'Pardon Libby' whine on snail-news the next day. Surprise, surprise! To summarize both treatises: when a Democrat lies about a blow-job, it's perjury but when a Neocon lies about covering up an act of's 'criminalizing politics'. Color me shocked.

The bad news? Last night two of the case's jurors were interviewed on the cable news shows and both expressed views that poor little Scooter-pie shouldn't be forced to wear soap-on-a-rope in a communal shower 'cuz he was just covering for his big mean boss! These jurors felt sorry for a man that obstructed an investigation into the illegal outing of a covert CIA agent and their brass plate operation, Brewster Jennings, set up to gather intelligence on WMD's in Iran. They felt sorry for a guy deeply involved in a revenge operation that compromised our national security and drove our nation to war on false pretenses. How disturbing is this scenario? People who judged that this man did in fact commit these crimes that have destroyed so many lives...want him pardoned.

I wonder how 'sorry' these same jurors would have felt for the defendant had this been an average case involving drugs with an average human being who was poor & dealing drugs because asking people if 'they want fries with that' can't pay the bills no matter how many hours a week they work. Would these same jurors be so willing to give the defendant a break? The answer is no. Even when the defendant is the girlfriend or wife named as an accomplice who was not directly involved at all. As someone who has sat on a jury like that, I can tell you the average sympathy for a person in that predicament I described is less than zero.

But, golly gee, put a really nice harmless-looking white guy in a nice suit with a perky perfect white wife standing by his side with a brood of perfectly cute white little private-school-going scrappers who sold the national security of his country out for political power in front of any 'Merkan jury and by gum we gotta pardon that guy! Hell that's the only reason we found him guilty cuz we'd know he'd be pardoned!

Logically it should be the other way around, you'd think we'd hold people of financial privilege and/or education who know better to, at the very least , an equal standard. But the average 'Merkan feels more sympathy for uber-wealthy bubble-people who get away with crap they couldn't than people of their own social standing. For example: Britney Spears should lose custody of her children. Any average woman in this country who publicly flashed her private parts, shaved her head, ran around screaming she is the Anti-Christ, been in and out of rehab four times in two weeks would most definitely lose her children. But not Britney. We're all sooooooo worried about this nutcase.

But the lady down the street who's working three jobs & raising her kids on her own with one four-hundredth of the income Ms. Spears enjoys can't fuck up even once without the fear of losing her children and no jury in our nation would feel one tenth as sorry for her as they would widdle Scooter-pie or Britney-poo.

So, pardon me Libby case jurors, but you are literally delusional if you think Scooter should be shown a shred of mercy. This man promoted a lie that put people in danger and embroiled our nation into a war that has cost us dearly in lives and treasury...not out of loyalty to his country but out of loyalty to an 'idea' he signed onto and out of loyalty to a political party. While you may sympathize with him, he has illustrated that he could give a rat's ass about you. But then again...maybe that's why you liked him sooo much.